How am I to know?

When I was 14 years old I made a commitment to save myself for my wife. At the time I didn’t know who my wife would be – heck, I barely even knew what I was committing to! And in the years to come I would discover it to be a constant battle and an extremely difficult commitment to maintain. However, when times got tough, when I felt weak, when I felt forgotten, when I felt lonely, whenever I was tempted to give up on my oath, I would always become overwhelmed with a sense that God had someone amazing planned for me. She would be more beautiful, more godly, more perfect for me than I could possibly imagine! He had a wonderful reward planned for me if I could just hang on.

In Genesis 15:1 the Lord came to Abram in a vision and told him that his “reward shall be very great.” To which Abram replied, “who cares if I receive a reward from you because I don’t have a child to inherit it!” (15:2-3; paraphrased by moi) Then the Lord went on to assure Abram that he would have offspring and that his concern was void. (15:4-5) What was Abram’s response to this reassurance? “And he believed the Lord…” (15:6)

When the Lord made that promise to me, I too believed. I believed when I was 14. I believed through my high school years. I believed through my college years. I believed through my 20’s. And I still believe to this day.

Even though Abram “believed the Lord,” he followed up with an intriguing question. “O Lord God, how am I to know…?” (15:8) And the Lord went on to provide him with an answer in his sleep.

So where does this leave me? I too shall beseech the Lord. “Oh Lord God, how am I to know?”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *